Saturday, November 8, 2008

Why you have to be selfish.

Yesterday afternoon when I was at work, I received an email, a facebook message, and the promise of a phone call from a "friend" of mine who wanted me to go somewhere with them [some place totally inconvenient for me] the next morning at 8:30.

I had not heard from this person in several months, so it came to me as kind of a shock as well as an annoyance that this invitation was seemingly so last minute as it was presenting the event as some sort of an obligation I had to carry through on.
madonna jennifer lopez

My stomach twisted at the thought of saying no to her, knowing that there will be questions, comments -- "What are you doing instead? Why can't you come? You'll miss out". Those types of comments.

The thing was, I wanted my time. Saturdays for me are the only day where I don't have to immediately interact with people when I'm first waking up. I want to do whatever the hell I want to do. The thought of me doing something at 10:30 on a Saturday also appalled me, as the event involved mass consumption of alcohol. I didn't want to be having to find a taxi in some obscure part of the area, because I will not drive under the influence of alcohol.

I began to think about what it meant to be selfish, to be greedy about your time. I simply do not have to tell people what I'm doing with my time, nor do I have to spend it on them. It kind of feels to be greedy, after giving away my time so freely for so long. I'm greedy, selfish, and I like it!

People act like their feelings get hurt when you say no. But saying no is powerful and under-rated. Do you think Jennifer Lopez agrees to do whatever people who randomly text her want to do? Do you think Madonna got where she was by accepting weird "dates" with people early on Saturday mornings?

So I will vow to be selfish with my time. I will do what I want to do. I don't feel bad or guilty about it -- in fact, I feel quite liberated!

What do you do that's selfish yet positive? Leave a comment and let's chat!!

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